'Diva demands from WAGs in AFL hubs getting more absurd'
A week into quarantini and our WAGs' sculpted noses are out of joint.
Actually it's not the only thing that's hanging out. The G-bangers are on display in full force at the Mercure Gold Coast Resort's pool in the sunshine state.
Goggle-eyed AFL executives are getting quite the eyeful. But more of that later.
Our WAGs say they are being unfairly maligned: one bad WAG can spoil the bunch.
Page 13 takes some responsibility. Last week, we wrote about the diva demands in hubland causing head honcho Gill McLachlan quite the headache.
Playing WAGatha Christie, we've put our high-maintenance WAGs under the magnifying glass.
Demands for "medical" spa sessions, a softer mattress and room renovations have been laid at the sun-kissed feet of Brooke Cotchin and the Richmond skipper.
To be fair, hubbing up in the Tiger den is like bedding down in the dorm.
A wall was knocked out as requested so there could be some "me" time away from the kids for Cotchin and his missus.
While the AFL aren't naming names (they don't want another Mitch Cleary situation) the word is the Cotchins are pretty much the only ones "having a sook."
Although someone did want to leave the hub to do a karate grading.
It wasn't Cotchin, and tongues wagging are the Richmond captain has been calling the AFL boss directly with his many requests.
No wonder a fed up AFL told clubs this week that all hub requests must now be directed through club CEOs.
That's turned out to be a big call for the likes of St Kilda's Matt Finnis and Collingwood's Mark Anderson.
They're at the WAG hub along with AFL execs Steve Hocking and Andrew Dillon. Former North Melbourne coach Brad Scott is also lurking near the goalposts.
Some Tiger wives and girlfriends who were stuck back in Melbourne doing remote learning with their kids were none too impressed to see their partners taking turns as babysitters in the hub.
These are not well-oiled whispers.
From 5pm to 8pm is happy hour at the Mercure resort but the WAGs round the pool in quaratini are capped as to how many drinks they can have each night.
They're not allowed to get liquored up and are cut off after four drinks. we are told.
Alcohol doesn't get included on the AFL dime and with no booze allowed from outside, that's it for the night.
"No one wants a bunch of drunken WAGs," said one of our hub detectives playing Miss Marple.
Hubbing on the whole is fairly ho-hum but there's more than one snake in the grass.
A python at Novotel's Twin Waters hub, shared by Hawthorn, Melbourne, North Melbourne and Melbourne Storm slithered onto the scene.
The python had supposedly swallowed a bush turkey and was frightening the AFL children.
Last we heard was players were making a mad dash to hunt down and relocate the python with its protruding belly.
Amid all this fun in the sun, it seems Melbourne coach Simon Goodwin has snared the best digs at the hub, with a swish suite overlooking the resort's lagoon.
But it's Collingwood who has the biggest entourage with around 170 players, WAGs and officials.
The Hawks have a more modest 100-odd, with their WAGS a bit younger and likely to become overexcited.
"It's G-string central at the pool," said another Miss Marple. "They are all trying to outdo each other."
Geelong WAGs, many with young children, are considered the most well-behaved and are low maintenance, with regular group pilates sessions to kick off the mornings.
Originally published as Diva demands from WAGs in AFL hubs getting more absurd